The Circus Academy of Tucson

"I was thinking to myself the other day while the power was out and winds were blowing and hail was destroying windshields all over Tucson. It occured to me that this could be a small taste of what is to come if societal collapse happens and we're left to our own devices without power. After the looting and pillaging and destruction, we would have to rebuild. Some would be blacksmiths, some would be bankers, some would be butchers and some would sell foot drawings. Me? I would be an entertainer. Because entertainment is a bulletproof industry and always has been. I figured I may as well get ahead of the curve and start brushing up on my entertainer skills. I found that Tucson had a circus academy and thought it would be a perfect way to learn some post-apocalyptic skills to bring me some loot for me and my tribe to survive. I'm sure people would be hankering for some knife throwing, some mustache strongman barbell lifting, some bears on a tricycle, some flaming sword swallowing, some trapeze flips, high fiving elephants, juggling, tightropes over an alligator pit and some bearded ladies. That's more of a sideshow thing but without readily available razors in the future, there will be some really cool looking bearded ladies walking around, especially here in Tucson. But NO CLOWNS. I don't care. No clowns. Clowns have no place in society now or in a future hellscape society where we have to eat boiled cactus without tajin. So I made sure I showed up prepared. I brought an old timey wooden stool and a whip that was left over from a tinder date 3 years ago. I brought a giant fake mustache and a big goofy American flag Apollo Creed hat, a bathrobe and a few photos of animals from the Reid Park Zoo that would likely escape with said future collapse. Pretty much coming in as clay ready to be molded by the circus pros. I exited my truck with my hands full and prepared to walk into some organized chaos. I thought I was going to duck under some big flames from a fire breather while moving past some sword duelers and people juggling tnt sticks balancing on a cannonball while creepy Danny Elfman music played. Oh man, I was WAY off. Very big, well lit facility filled with kids and adults practicing tumbling and acrobatics with giant hanging aerial silks and rings. I thought I had the wrong spot and tried to act natural by looking around and nodding at everything. A lady came over with a slightly concerned look on her face and I hid the whip behind my back. She asked if I was looking for somewhere and I told her I pretty much told her that I was looking to learn some big tent circus skills that would be applicable to an impending Mad Max desert futurescape. She then complimented my hat and giant mustache before telling me that I probably would be better off looking for someone else as they don't currently offer any coursework and lack the accredited staff that would be able to cover regulations and safety measures when working with dangerous, illegal exotic animals, sharp objects and pyrotechnics. They can help with the juggling and acrobatics, but I didnt' want to admit how much I hated cardio so i twirled the mustache and said "nah, I'm good." She was very kind and I said a very saddened thank you before taking off the big hat and doing the old fashioned showman bow out. Like they say, Spit in one hand and wish in the other, and see which one fills up first. Since I didn't really want to spit in my hand, I just got some Whataburger, went home and watched Youtube videos on lion taming. Oh well. Either way, nice facility and staff. 5 stars."

"I absolutely adore the circus academy! I've been attending for a few years now, and it's one of my favorite places to be. The coaches are wonderful and overall the environment is amazing! The studio is such a safe space for me to learn and try new things, and I'm so grateful to have discovered the academy!"

"Circus can be for anyone! I starting practicing aerial silks about a year ago and have fallen in love with the activity. Small group classes for adults ensure everyone is getting the attention and coaching that they need, and the instructors work with your abilities to both help you improve and enjoy yourself."

"the teacher for kinder is great. She's very patient with our 2yr old but still firm so she's paying attention and not running around. It can be a little warm inside so bring plenty of water. My daughter loves it and says it's her favorite summer program."