Rural King,

701 North Commercial Street, Harrisburg, IL 62946

"An absolutely retarded place. Average staff member couldn't find their way out of a closet without a crayon colored road map. They always send the most morbidly obese employees to waddle outside and risk heart attack to fetch the carts. No sympathy for donut lovers. They'll let you pay for outside yard items that they're too stupid to realize they don't actually have in stock. Like turnstiles, fencing, and also metal barrels without any lids. Because lids, is stuuupid. The place always smells funny. Maybe that has something to do with all the poop from the bin full of baby chickens. And I hope you're not broke enough, that you need to return a 5 dollar item. Because ALL returns require a driver's license to be scanned into their system. So, enjoy identity theft, right along with your five bucks. Possibly having someone else trashing your credit, good reputation, or commit a crime in your name. ---Fun stuff. But don't worry... I'm sure the cynical Judge who's heard a million lies will believe you when you cry innocence. And it's more than likely. Because I doubt the slack-jawed Einstein club over there has the best anti-hacking mechanisms within their wired system. Maybe the wires are clogged up with all the baby chicken poop."

"So typically, I visit my nearest Rural King in the n xt town over usually looking to get the cheapest spray paint around because I'm always working on a project or their hefty sized battery packages for a low price, and occasionally I'll just go to wander around wishing I was rich so I could buy 1 of everything. It never fails if it's either the meant-to-be-quick-trip or the time killer visit I always get stuck. Last visit I tried to decide what was my favorite aisle.. impossible! Every aisle in the store had something that captivated my attention and held on strong for a nudge at being the winning aisle for my personal fav. It's really unfair that I wasn't born into a disgustingly rich family with money to burn so I could rescue it from the flames and take it to Rural King to get that mini chainsaw I so desire because the Stihl is really to much for me. ....or the 2500 lumen flash light so I can see for a mile off my back step or a medium sized collection of hummingbird feeders to hang from every twig of my dogwood so I can watch them swarm around and buzz past me. Endless cans of wasp spray and a few dozen bags of saltwater taffy never hurt anyone either ....but Ill keep wishing and Rural King, yall keep the popcorn warm and the animals happy, as you always do!"

"Great store. Bought some work boots there made in the USA all leather. They have cloths and all kinds of things. I didn't look around too much, but the store was clean, and the cashier was so sweet. So check it out for well-made products."

"Great little hardware store that will probably have what you are looking for."